Would've Written This Sooner

But, had to reply to a few hundred text messages...

This scenario is probably not as far-fetched as it might sound. In fact, it's probably what teachers and parents are hearing from kids failing to do their schoolwork (or rather not hearing - who's going to admit the real reason?). The Kaiser Family Foundation has a study to prove it.

We've known for quite a while that kids are spending more and more time with their digital media - laptops, pda's, cell phones. What we didn't know was how much time. The results are startling to say the least: seven and a half hours a day! And, even that is not an accurate calculation as kids are multitasking and therefore combining about eleven hours of media usage into that time. It's scary...

But, what's even more surprising on the surface is that not all of these kids are happy doing it. One would assume that keeping in touch with friends or the latest song would provide hours of happiness. But, as reported in this NYTimes' article, "The heaviest media users were also more likely than the lightest users to report that they were bored or sad, or that they got into trouble, did not get along well with their parents and were not happy at school."

It is only surprising on the surface, because when you stop to think about it, it makes a lot of sense. In fact, it's what the older generations have been worried about. All of the concern for the lack of outdoor time or the loss of human contact, the physical pains from playing video games or the emotional tolls of constantly needing to be "up-to-speed" with all that is happening in the world are not just old folks who don't understand. These voices should serve to remind us that these devices and ways of communicating should never become our way of life, just add to it.

These technologies have become so intertwined in our lives, it's hard to see life without them. But, it's important to take a break from anything that is consuming our days to reconnect with people or just to reflect. And, technology is no different.

How Can I Help?

Natural disasters of any kind with human casualties always lead to heart-wrenching stories. The earthquake in Haiti is no exception. Whether it is the sheer number of displaced, injured, or deceased, the schools and orphanages destroyed, the volunteers working tirelessly to save lives, or any other story to come out of this catastrophic event, you would have to be heartless to not be moved in some way.

People everywhere are wondering what they can do to help. Some want to donate money to the "right" charity, others want to donate items, some wish to volunteer there or in places like Miami receiving Haitians being flown out of the country, and still others are coming up with creative ways to keep the situation in their hearts and minds without getting overwhelmed by the media coverage. How is your school covering Haiti and the earthquake? We would love to know and pass on ideas to other teachers...

As for donating to disaster relief efforts, please visit Charity Navigator if you are trying to figure out where best to send your donations. You can review and follow the charities of your choice, and as you can imagine, there is a wealth of knowledge regarding this most recent tragedy.

Public Action has always been a central theme to The Girls & Boys Projects. Thanks to all of you who instill this message in your students and those around you. Stay involved...

*Note: These images were taken from The NY Times' site. They have posted some fantastic multimedia online...

Forgive The Tardiness

But, we thought this story is too important to go unnoticed by us. The Obama administration recently appointed Amanda Simpson to the role of technical advisor to The Department of Commerce. Why is this significant? She is the first openly transgender appointment from The White House.

In an article from Sphere, Mara Keisling, executive director for the National Center for Transgender Equality, is quoted as saying: "What's significant about it is that we finally have an administration in which being transgender isn't a disqualifying factor for a job." That's a reassuring thought. So many hires are questioned for potentially only filling an affirmative action need. This does not appear to be such an appointment, and furthermore, could lessen the misunderstandings or fears potential employers might have in making a similar hire.

Simpson understands the importance of her role: "...as one of the first transgender presidential appointees to the federal government, I hope that I will soon be one of hundreds, and that this appointment opens future opportunities for many others." Hear hear!

You Be The Judge

Humorous? Racist? Just good fun? Hard to say...

The line between when to laugh at ourselves and when to be offended is sometimes unclear and often inconsistent. Either way, it's hard to be mad at those who find this funny... But, it's also ok to hope they understand the damaging effects stereotypes can have...

Making Their Voices Heard

We thought it would be a good idea to post this video today. It is entitled "Voices" and was first aired publicly at our benefit dinner in 2008. We can talk about the benefit of our programs to no end, but it sometimes just makes more sense to hear it from those who are most directly affected by them: your students.

The video always reminds us of why we do the work we do. Hopefully, it will do the same for you. Enjoy!

Happy New Year, Unhappy New York!

Huh?

You may have seen the CDC's study on overall happiness in every state in America. The study, started in 1984, collected data surrounding individual health and satisfaction with life. The results were recently released... Guess where New York ranked?

Yep, dead last. (Did they interview Knicks fans, or something?)

How could you not love the city that never sleeps?! Except, of course, if you are looking for a city that sleeps... The Top 10 states on the happiness scale: 1. Louisiana, 2. Hawaii, 3. Florida, 4. Tennessee, 5. Arizona, 6. Mississippi, 7. Montana, 8. South Carolina, 9. Alabama and 10. Maine. Bottom 3? 49. New Jersey, 50. Connecticut and 51. New York (D.C. was included in the study). For the complete list, click here.

Regardless of where you are, The Girls & Boys Projects hopes you find happiness in 2010! And, we should note... We LOVE being in New York!

Happy Holidays From Us To You!

Saw their performance this week on The Jay Leno Show and thought, "These are the cutest kids..." And, they sound angelic: The African Children's Choir - perfect for the holidays. (The video was removed, but here they are in another performance)

Thank you for reading our blogs, for being friends of The Girls & Boys Projects, and for taking interest in the many issues we address here. Happy Holidays, and keep doing the great work!

Makes ME Wanna Holler.

Did you ever read Nathan McCall's 1994 book Makes Me Wanna Holler? If so, you might recall a graphic and honest recount of McCall as a young boy participating in an abhorrible act - the gang rape of a young, unsuspecting girl. The section is entitled "Trains" - the nickname given to the act of one boy after another participating in this group rape. And, it makes you sick to your stomach reading it...


It's hard to get the image out of your head. The questions that arise about the attackers are endless, the answers unsatisfying. Why? How could you take part in this? What makes you think it's acceptable? How could you not care about another human being like this? There is hardly a response that will lessen the anger you feel as an outsider looking in.


And, you should know that as you read this story that came out of the Bay Area in October. On the school grounds of Richmond High School, during a homecoming dance, a 15-year old girl was brutally beaten and raped by 10 young men, while at least 20 people watched and did nothing. As with so many of these gang rapes, the victim went voluntarily to the destination - in this case, an alley near the school - but, what began as hanging out turned quickly to an attack.

The details of the story can be found in the article link above and won't be revisited here, but so many phrases from the article pop out at you: "macho," "bravado," "degradation of women." We've heard these terms associated with boys and young men for far too long. But, they are important to remind us what we're up against in raising young boys to make smart choices in becoming positive young men.

A teacher at Richmond's quotation in the article speaks volumes: "Those boys who did what they did weren't picturing that girl as a human. I think you see these kinds of boys at a lot of high schools - so desensitized it was like they saw her as a toy. Boys like that - there aren't many like them, but they can be so hard. All they needed was something to set them off."

Here's to hoping there really aren't "that many like them."

Christmas Wrapper?

New York City is hosting a contest to design the wrapper of the NYC Condom. The city gives away more than 40 million each year and provides a bunch of related information on its site. You can find a history of condoms, why and how to use them, and how to obtain free condoms. Great opportunity to increase awareness...

Let's Talk About Sex!

Jay Leno commented on a study earlier this week that revealed that parents wait too long to talk to their kids about sex. By the time they start the conversation, kids are already active. Jay's joke?

"Hey Kev, you know what you call parents who wait too long to talk about sex with their kids? Grandparents."

Nicely done, sir... But, he does bring up a good point, albeit extreme. Wait too long and... well, you may have waited too long! It's a topic that parents struggle with across the board: When is the right time to talk to my child about sex?

According to the piece in NurtureShock (a Newsweek blog), when kids start asking the questions, parents should start providing the answers. The article continually mentions "The Talk" and when to sit down with your kids. And, some of the reader comments demonstrate just how scary it can be for a parent... and just how necessary it is for a child.

But, thinking of it as "The Talk" is probably what makes it so daunting. If your children have questions about where babies come from at 3 or 4, answer those questions as honestly and directly (trying not to get lost in metaphor) as you can. And, if you feel you've left something out or need to explain something better, come back the next day and add to it. By creating ongoing dialogue, you're creating a safe space for your children to ask questions whenever they arise, thus putting the pieces in place to help them make informed decisions in life. And, you probably won't be overwhelmed with questions you're not prepared to answer (or uncomfortable with) in one session - as you might be if you wait until your child is 16!

There is no one way to go about this - each parent has to do what works best for them and what their kids need most. Hopefully, however, people will discuss less and less "The Talk" and more often, well, just talks.
__

Of course, the title of this post only makes you think... Salt-N-Pepa! They know what they're talking about...

Let's talk about sex for now 
to the people at home / or in the crowd

It keeps coming up anyhow
Don't decoy, avoid, or make void the topic
'Cuz that ain't gonna stop it

P.S. This statistic jumped out at us: "And about 60 percent of kids had heard about contraception and STDs before their sexual initiation." It's mind-boggling to read statistics like these... and, reassuring to know just how needed programs like The Girls & Boys Projects are...