Don't Google Your Name!

It was advice given by a former American Idol contestant to the current cast.  Rihanna may need to take this advice to heart.

The internet reaction to the Rihanna-Chris Brown saga has been alarming . . . and, yet, somewhat predictable. Were Rihanna to read these comments, she might start to believe that this assault was her fault. Young female voices are placing the blame on Rihanna in large numbers - and in no uncertain terms. Yes, they are girls and young women, but they are also fans:

“She probly ran into a door and was too embarrassed so blamed it on chris.” (NYTimes March 18, 2009)

After sitting in on a NYC middle school advisory this week, it is clear that this "siding" [with Chris Brown] is the norm, not the exception. Are we raising a generation of girls that will come to accept violence in relationships as normal? Even worse, are we raising boys who are listening to these girls and thinking, "If they don't have a problem with it..."

The Othello lesson at the end of the article (above) is one approach to addressing this issue. Would love to hear what else is being done out there...

Take A Bow

The one upside to celebrity gossip is when certain issues that normally go undiscussed gain a national spotlight. Be it adoptions from Africa, children with autism, or adults battling addictions we are reminded of many hard realities in our world. Sadly, that is the case with pop stars Rihanna and Chris Brown. Their recent bout with domestic violence surprised many; their reuniting surprised few. But, it allows us the opportunity to highlight a real issue - young people face unhealthy relationships, too.

The statistics are staggering.  Some put the number at 25% of teens and college-aged young adults have experienced physical, emotional, or sexual abuse from their partners, most often boyfriends. The number of those who report knowing someone who has been a victim is much, much higher.

HelpGuide.org is a fantastic resource for warning signs, hotlines, and general information about this alarming trend. The site also has a "Power and Control" graphic on how domestic violence manifests itself:

Although the song discusses infidelity, the lyrics to Rihanna's hit song "Take A Bow" speak volumes:

You look so dumb right now

Standing' outside my house

Trying' to apologize

You're so ugly when you cry

Please, just cut it out

And don't tell me you're sorry 'cause you're not

Baby when I know you're only sorry you got caught

But you put on quite a show

Really had me going

But now it's time to go

Curtain's finally closing

That was quite a show

Very entertaining'

But it's over now (but it's over now)

Go on and take a bow

Wish it were that easy...