Chase Giving

If you're a Facebooker, you've undoubtedly seen a ton of activity alerting you that a friend of yours has voted in the "Chase Community Giving Challenge." Now through December 11, charities have a chance to win awards ranging from $25,000-$1 million! Chase is giving away a total of $5 million to 100 worthy charities. So...

PLEASE VOTE FOR US!!

Of course, we thank you for all of your votes and support. Please forward and let your Facebook friends know, too!

And, please note:

1. You must have a Facebook account to vote.

2. Our 501(c)(3) name is The Institute for Labor & The Community, Inc. But, we are still The Girls & Boys Projects, as you've always known us. :)

3. We've heard that some people have encountered some issues with the Chase application - specifically, with whether their vote registered. If you do, please be patient and try to vote again.

We know you want to scroll down and read more entries, but go vote, then come back! Happy Holidays!!

I Was Weight-Listed

Typo? Turns out, it's not... Ever heard of Lincoln University in Oxford, PA? Well, the school is breaking new ground in the arenas of fitness and health. And, upsetting quite a few folks in the process.

In 2006, in an effort to address the obesity epidemic in our country, the university implemented a Do Ask, Don't Swell policy. Every incoming frosh's Body Mass Index (BMI) was measured upon entering. Of the 19% who measured above 30 (the U.S. Dept. of Health and Human Services threshold for obesity), around 25 now seniors have not lowered their BMI, nor have they taken the required course to demonstrate that they are at least educated about the health risks. The result? They are in jeopardy of not graduating.

The approach is somewhat radical, and definitely controversial. Read the following article's comments section and you will see there is much debate on the legality, as well as the ethics of this policy. Many schools have health requirements - courses that students must take to graduate, but Lincoln seems to be among the first to tie this to obesity and each student's BMI.

The school's heart seems to be in the right place: let's put out educated, but also healthy graduates. While it's a really ugly position for graduating seniors to be facing, maybe the course will help them to really question their health and wellness. Remember, they are not being required to lose weight; just to take a class. And, on the surface, it seems like taking a semester-long course pales in comparison to getting a new perspective on your well-being.

Fun cartoons on obesity and health in this article...

If I Were A Boy…

If you’re an avid sports fan, you think you’ve pretty much seen it all. And, then that happens…

On November 5, 2009, University of New Mexico soccer player Elizabeth Lambert, at best, lost her cool in a game vs. BYU. At worst, she crossed the line between on-field violence and assault. In a video montage that might make Mike Tyson cringe (or smile, not sure), Lambert is seen tugging, pushing, elbowing, punching, kicking, and eventually viciously yanking the ponytail of an opponent on the pitch.This type of incident undoubtedly brings attention from the media and casual fan alike. People not used to seeing how physical contact sports can be are disgusted at what they saw. In particular, many are shocked to see it occur amongst young women.

Most already know that these games are physical. The pushing and elbowing are hardly newsworthy. But, we can probably all agree that the ponytail pull crossed a serious line. Not only could she have seriously injured someone, but it was an ugly cheapshot.

However, there is a place one should take exception in this story. Lambert says, “I definitely feel because I am a female it did bring about a lot more attention than if a male were to do it. It’s more expected for men to go out there and be rough.”

The notion that the story would not warrant such attention if it were men playing - that this type of violence is not a big deal in men’s sports - could not be further from the truth. While many may have been appalled because of the gender of the players involved, let us not forget the type of attention male players receive when their actions extend beyond the unwritten rules of aggressive, but fair play. To avoid turning this into a sports blog, here are some terms you should Google at your own leisure to see if her opinion holds weight:

• Mike Tyson + Evander Holyfield + ear + bite
• J.R. Reid + A.C. Green + teeth
• Rudy Tomjanovich + Kermit Washington + punch
• Jerramy Stevens + Tyler Brayton + knee
• Marty McSorley + Donald Brashear + stick
• Troy Polamalu + hair tackle

The list goes on and on. And, in many of these incidents, fans argued whether criminal charges should have been filed (some were). In certain cases, the violence even led to changes in the laws that govern the sport.

To say men do not receive this type of attention is simply false. If a male player yanked another player’s hair, snapping his neck back while he wasn’t looking? We would have been discussing criminal charges. There is precedence for this type of aggressive act.

Elizabeth Lambert was wrong in her opinion and wrong in her actions. Hopefully, she will continue to try to make it right.

"My Man... Fix Your Skirt."

That probably doesn't sound as strange to the current generation of teens as it would to their parents.

It is safe to assume that as with any school rule, dress codes have been challenged since their inception. Girls have fought over skirt length and makeup, boys over blazers and ties. Even The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air wore his blazer inside out and, occasionally, his ties around his head - pushing the letter of the law without breaking it.

But, "Can A Boy Wear A Skirt To School?" brings light to an entirely new set of challenges and questions regarding dress code, gender identity, sexuality, and safety. And, it is clear from where this article gets its information, this is a widespread discussion (the schools range from Florida to California, Ohio to Texas, and everywhere in between).

What's the main issue, you ask? Wish it were that easy. The issues are complex and large in number: the stifling of identity, a lack of tolerance, protection from harassment, harassment, conformity, discouragement of self-expression, the limiting of classroom disruptions, and the list goes on. How do you address the students who want to cross-dress, and the teacher who says the other kids in the class can't concentrate? Or, the case of Lawrence King - a young boy who had something in him telling him to dress a certain way that didn't fit with the norm. He was happy that way. And, yet there was a classmate who had something in him telling him that a boy who dresses that way . . . doesn't deserve to live?

It's probably safe to say that most parents want the same three things for their child at school: to learn, to be safe, to be happy. The question is... in what order?

Resources For Educators

In addition to fostering discussions, the Boy Talk blog is also your home for educational resources! Actually, it's a when-we-have-something-to-share-we-will situation...

The New York Times Learning Network is a fantastic knowledge base to which every teacher should subscribe. Last month, the site changed formats to a blog with all sorts of features including thousands (yes, thousands!) of free (yes, free!) lesson plans for teachers, quizzes, student opinions, and many more resources. In fact, today there is a very spirited debate on the question: "Should gay couples be allowed to marry?" Be forewarned: On this particular thread, as is to be expected, there is some ignorance in the comments section - but, the issues being addressed and the information being shared is well-worth the read, and may even inspire you to facilitate a similar discussion in your school.

A recent Google search revealed a fantastic resource called Jeopardy Labs. The site allows you to create actual Jeopardy-style games to use with your students! It's amazing how easy the site is to use, and how perfect the interactive template will be in your class (keeps track of team scoring and everything!). The best feature however, is the database. There are hundreds of previously made Jeopardy games (templates) created by other users and available for you to use. So, let's say you want to create a quiz on the topic of weather. Simply search for it through the "Start Browsing" link and use as you see fit! You can even modify the template if you need to change answers or point values, etc. Fantastic resource (and free!!)...

Lastly: HelpGuide.org is a great site filled with information, links, telephone numbers, and thoughts related to issues of grief, stress, addiction, disorders, and the list goes on. Whether you have concerns about people around you, or questions about your own mental or physical health, this site provides many answers and directions on where to find help. Highly recommend browsing their pages...

A First Time For Everything

Every now and then, you read a story and think to yourself, "Seriously, what is wrong with men?" (You do, right?)

Well, if you haven't, this will be the first. The Guardian reports that a Chinese company has been manufacturing artificial "Virginity Hymens." (I'm sorry, did he just say-) Yes, you read correctly.

The goal is obvious: to give her partner the illusion that it is her first time having sex.

The product itself is wrong on almost too many levels to cover here. But, it is the motivation behind its creation that's even more disturbing. For whom was this created? If we were discussing saving women's lives in countries where women are persecuted or murdered for allegedly losing their virginity before marriage, women who may have previously been raped or simply not bled during intercourse, the need for such a product would be saddening, but at least noble in attempt.

Judging from the website's product description, and the fact that it is sold on an adult toys site, protecting women was not the impulse:

No more worry about losing your virginity. With this product, you can have your first night back anytime. Insert this artificial hymen into your vagina carefully. It will expand a little and make you feel tight. When your lover penetrate, it will ooze out a liquid that look like blood not too much but just the right amount. Add in a few moans and groans, you will pass through undetectable. Its easy to use, clinically proven non-toxic to human and has no side effects, no pain to use and no allergic reaction.

Is this what some men really need? Are we still so obsessed with virginity that we have to create modern versions of archaic practices to trick men into believing they are sleeping with virgins? And, in truth, it's not just men holding women to these unrealistic, anatomical standards - there are women who thrust equal venom at pre-marital sex. But, of course, if it didn't matter to men so much . . .

It's sad that in 2009 we are reverting to such practices; pathetic that we would even have to.

We can do so much better than this...

A Golden Girl, Indeed

Who didn't love Bea Arthur? Just ask someone (over 30?) what they think of Bea and you'll probably hear, "I loved Bea Arthur!" They may even add something about how great Golden Girls was...

And, then you read a headline like this: "Bea Arthur Leaves $300K To Gay Youth". . . and you love her even more.

For those who may have heard your mothers say over and over, "Everything happens for a wise purpose," you will appreciate the light Bea's death and donation has brought to a cause she truly believed in. Protecting homeless LGBT youth is The Ali Forney Center's mission. Since 2002, the organization has housed and helped thousands of LGBT youth who have been forced out of their homes for being... well, who they are.

The center's work is incredibly noble and worthy of support. And, thankfully, even in death - Bea Arthur continues to help keep that work alive.

David, David, David - What Have You Done?

The news broke on October 1, 2009: David Letterman had multiple affairs with female staffers. And, he was being blackmailed for $2 million. Yikes.

The story is not uncommon - man cheating on his wife; employer sleeping with employee; celebrity guilty of, well, something!

The question now becomes, "Is there a lawsuit coming?" We live in America - of course there's a lawsuit coming! A better question is how many or which kinds of lawsuits? It's not yet clear if this is grounds for a sexual harassment suit - either by the women he slept with, or by the other staffers who had to work in this environment. This article from Find Law is a great breakdown on the possible, legal implications of his actions, as well as a differentiation between types of harassment and whether there is a case here (if legal nuances bore you, you may want to skip to the second half of the article).

Even more interesting is the discussion about the working environment at The Late Show, and in the workplace, in general. Nell Scovell, a former writer from The Late Show, wrote a compelling, personal tale in Vanity Fair of what it was like to work for Letterman; what is was like to not be the object of his affection; to know your career would not progress because you were one of his... types. It is clearly hard enough to be a writer in these all-male dominated writing rooms of late night television (Conan, Leno, and Letterman all employ NO female writers), but how much harder must it be when you're juggling sexual politics as well?

So many issues have surfaced because of this story. Hopefully, people will not shy away from discussing appropriate and inappropriate behavior in the workplace. Obviously, some people meet their significant others at their jobs (David Letterman's wife was a production staffer at Late Night when they met). On his last show, Jay Leno introduced us to over 60 kids who had been born to staffers who met while working for the show over the past 17 years. These were staff members... but, shouldn't the boss be held to a higher standard? When your name appears above the building you walk into everyday, don't you set the tone for everything that goes on there? This article in New York Magazine seems to suggest as much where it quotes one former staffer as saying of Dave and his assistants: "They rule by fear. You don’t want to make Dave mad or so-and-so mad, so you better do a good job. Everyone there is scared of their shadow all the time.”

With that type of working environment, how many women who value their jobs are willing to turn an advance away? And, how many more struggle to figure out how they can get in the boss' good graces? It's a complicated situation, no question . . . But, completely avoidable.

Couldn't resist:

The Top Ten Things To Learn From David Letterman's Escapades:

10. Extortion? Not cool.
9. It may never be clear whether these women had relationships with Letterman to advance their careers, because they felt they had to, or just because they wanted to.
8. Hitting on people who work for you is in the least inappropriate, at worst sexual harassment.
7. Not hitting on some, while hitting on others, is sexual favoritism and can create a "hostile work environment."
6. Late-night talk shows have no female writers.
5. This will probably do nothing to Letterman's popularity, but let's hope it fosters change in the business of The Late Show.
4. Blackmail is the least of David Letterman's concerns.
3. The ignorance in the "Comments" section of Letterman-related articles is astounding.
2. Apparently, none of us would understand the reference of a "head cheerleader" without accompanying it with an insult: a former staffer said, "...I think he's also going for easy targets... He's not going to ask the head of the cheerleading team to prom. He's going to ask the head of the band or something." (What did the head of the band do to you?!)
1. Don't cheat on your wife.

The Worst Man In History

Who, you ask? Try all of us. Yep, modern man, when compared to men of the past - way, way back, past - could be the "the sorriest cohort of masculine Homo sapiens to ever walk the planet." That according to a new book by Peter McAllister entitled, "Manthropology."

In the book, McAllister, an anthropologist, makes claims that prehistoric man was faster and stronger than man is today. In fact, some women were stronger than modern man is today, too. The why [this happened] makes perfect sense - we don't have to run down our own food anymore, we don't take part in war the same way, and our tests of manhood come in very different forms now. The why he chose to reveal this information is less clear.

*Note: It might be important to introduce a new "Man Law" at this time:

• Rule #45: If you find in your research that man has become weak, shiftless, and a basic waste of space, do not release these findings in a book that is easily accessible by our female counterparts.

Can you hear the fights men and women will have now?! ("You aren't half the man you used to be!") The insults are limitless... Women already have enough ammunition with the dumb things men do, why provide more fodder?

It that's not enough, wait for McAllister's next book about the Aka Pygmies of Western Congo: "Dubbed the 'best fathers in the world', the men spent most of their time raising the children, going so far as to offer their nipples for the babies to suck on."

MCALLISTERRRR!!! WHAT'RE YOU TRYING TO DO HERE?!?!

Hopefully, his work will open up some interesting dialogues on the concepts of health, activity, and manhood. Even if it does paint a sorrowing picture of devolution...

Out Of The Darkness

Sponsored by the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, the "Out of the Darkness Community Walks" are designed to raise money and awareness to the issues of depression and suicide. They also assist those who have lost someone close to them to suicide.

Among the facts you can read on their site, AFSP posts that although women attempt suicide three times as much as men, men account for four times as many deaths by suicide. And, looking through the statistics, many of them "make sense;" meaning, one can understand the reasons behind them. For example, although guns are the leading method of suicide in both men and women, men tend to use this more immediate, more fatal option first vs. trying pills or other methods. Women tend to seek help (in this case, a cry for help) more than men. No matter the reason or method, those left behind after suicide must "try to make sense of it."

Last winter, two high-school boys in New York City - one at Packer Collegiate School, one at The Dalton School - took their lives, leaving their communities struggling to find answers. This Sunday, October 18th, a team from Packer is walking to honor their classmate, student, and friend Chris. If you would like more information on how to participate, or wish to monitor or donate to team "Packer Generations" (they've already raised over $11,000!), please visit the site.